Monday, January 5, 2009

For the Lulz

HELL EXPLAINED BY CHEMISTRY STUDENT

The following is an actual question given on a University Chemistry
mid term. The answer by one student was so 'profound' that the
professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of
course, is why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well:

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic
(absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law
(gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some
variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So
we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the
rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume
that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls
are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at
the different religions that exist in the world today.

Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their
religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these
religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion,
we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates
as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase
exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in
Hell because Boyle 's Law states that in order for the temperature
and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to
expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls
enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase
until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls
in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell
freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman
year that, 'It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,'
and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then
number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic
and has already frozen over! The corollary of this theory is that
since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any
more souls and is therefore, extinct..... .leaving only Heaven,
thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why,
last night, Teresa kept shouting 'Oh my God.'

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+



Taken from ze internets. ROFLCOPTERS. This dude is made of win.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

=,=

i'm half-offended by the answers cos i'm a physics student (i also learn about thermodynamic stuff)...


but no worries... the other half is entertained at the joke. it's funny! now i can tell my science friends about it~ XD (we srsly do need some illogical stuff cos we deal with too much facts @_@ )
- VN

mahata said...

oops sorry! XD but it's still funny as hell!

Anonymous said...

lol wat. jangan buli??

one thing tho. ROFL OMG D: D: apakah jawapan itu. how amusing. if i were that guy's prof i'd proly be in ICU due to

1 - lack of oxygen due to extreme laughing

2 - for falling off my chair and hit my head somewhere during those pening lalat moment when i lack air.

what an answer...@_@

Johan said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Johan said...

WAKAKAKKAKAKAKKAKAKA!!!

OH MY GOD!!!


The student received an A+ just by providing some basic explanation and being funny about it.

Okay! If ever any of my students can produce an answer as hilarious as that, top score awaits them!